Levi's Grim Reminder
by dippytrippy122
Summary: What I, as a straight male, think of the whole 'Fan Girls creepily liking Levi to death thing', and what I believe would happen if they had somehow managed to be a part of the whole 'Attack on Titan' world. Definitely crack-filled, and not meant to be taken seriously. I hope you enjoy! And please don't get too upset if I seemingly bash any characters... It's all done as a joke xD.


**Disclaimer: **I Don't own Attack on Titan/Shingeki no Kyojin or whatever :3 :')

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><p><span><strong>Chapter One(?) - When Fan Girls Attack<strong>

It was a warm, sunny day for the people living behind the slab of rock known as 'Wall Rose'. Ignoring the blatantly obvious fact of life that the titans were most likely going to break through, sooner rather than later, the people continued along their merry way enjoying doing nothing more than relaxing.

Well… _Most_ people were doing that anyway…

"AH! GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!"

"NEVERRRRRR!"

Everyone in the Survey Corps turned towards the offending sound with mixed reactions. Eren quickly entered an angsty rant about how they should be out and killing titans instead of 'messing around', which promptly earned him a slap followed by some coddling from resident love interest, Mikasa. Armin began overreacting as normal, falling back on his ass for no discernible reason; hyperventilating as he did so. Following this, Sasha pulled a potato out of God knows where and began to… Oh God why or how-?

Let's just move on now, shall we? Ignoring the moaning that now emanated from the girl closest to him, Erwin just sighed in exasperation at seeing just how out of control his faction of people truly was. Walking towards the tree closest to his position, he began to bang his head against it repeatedly in an attempt to block out the horrors occurring around him. Reiner and Bertolt, the only two 'sane' people left in the entire force, just looked at each other before sighing in resignation.

It was days like this that made them wonder if ending humanity was even worth the effort that they were putting in…

No… No, it probably wasn't.

"GODAMMIT YOU GIRLS, LISTEN TO ME! I AM A COMMANDING OFFICER AND-!"

The black-haired neat-freak, nearly tripped over an incoming rock which had jutted itself too far out of the ground for his liking. Swerving out of the way of a tree that had seemingly appeared out of nowhere, he couldn't help but gnash his teeth together.

'_Whoever the hell decided for us to hold our meeting in the middle of a fucking forest, has got another thing coming to them.'_

Gulping down the brief feelings of apprehension that had begun to work its way into his subconscious at this point, he turned his head to look behind him and asses the danger that he was in.

This proved to be a big mistake.

The downright possessed looks that many of the girls had on their faces up to this point, only increased in intensity as the object of their desires turned around to look at them.

Fear. True and unadulterated _fear. _This was the first time in a long time that Levi Ackerman truly felt this, as the reality of what it was that was chasing him, began to truly set in…

"Fan girls…"

"KAWAIIIIIII!"

The accidentally verbalized thought, quickly enticed the girls that much farther, as they suddenly rushed towards their obsession much in the same way that a Titan does when they are chasing their prey.

Too soon? Yeah probably… Anyway:

As the group rounded a small foliage of trees back towards their base of operations, Levi led the group of countless females over to the rest of his companions.

"OUT OF THE WAY YOU IDIOTS!"

No sooner had the words been spoken, that he dove out of the woods behind him; the girls hot on his trail. Hiding behind a stray bush, he looked out in absolute horror at the sight in front of him.

'_Oh God… What have I done?'_

It was a massacre.

Everyone, guys and girls alike, were being picked off one by one, as the sheer number of the girls proved too much for even the most combat-ready of his companions. He watched in worried anticipation as nearly the entirety of his military force was promptly knocked out and dragged off to places unknown.

Holding his head in his hands, he looked down to the floor with wide eyes.

'_I can't believe that I let this happen to all of my comrades… I-I…'_

He gulped before shaking his head slightly, and narrowing his eyes in an overly sexy manner (insert fan girl screams here).

"No… I will not let their sacrifices be in vain."

Pushing his way through the shrubbery in an over-exaggerated manner; showing off his biceps to the lucky fan girls present, he flipped his hair slightly before beckoning the girls towards him with his hands.

"Come and get me… Girls."

They were off like a stampede, each trying to grab a piece of his clothing… or skin.

"MARRY ME LEVI-SAN-SENPAI-SENSEI-SAMA!"

"I WANT YOU INSIDE ME RIGHT NOW!"

"TAKE ME LEVI-SENPAI, TAKE ME!"

He fought valiantly that day. Jumping in and around the horde of over a thousand girls, he managed to take most of them out; all the while ignoring the fact that his ass had been severely violated by this point.

But alas, even the greatest fighter in the Survey Corps, couldn't survive the continuous onslaught of his fan girls. Eventually, with the inclusion of a surprise Taser, he fell to the ground in a sudden paralysis.

As he fell down, in what felt like slow motion, he couldn't help the slight shudder that found its way across his entire body. Watching as the remaining girls surrounded him, he looked up at the sky; a single tear falling from his usually expressionless face.

'_I'm sorry everyone… I have failed you…'_

Another quick tase for good measure, and the combat-centric titan-fighter was down for the count.

Nodding towards each other in agreement, the girls hoisted the black-haired boy by his shoulders; dragging him along the ground towards a large circle which had been drawn into the ground, seemingly recently.

A few satanic hand symbols later, and the girls all disappeared alongside the unwilling General.

Not even a trace was left behind to indicate what had occurred that day, and no one would ever find out what truly happened to the near-entirety of the Survey Corps.

To this day, the only thing that reminds the townspeople of the old Military branch's existence, are the occasional moans from an infinite amount of girls, as well as the pained cries of many a man and woman, especially that of a certain black-haired ex-General.

To ensure that a tragedy of this level never happens again, in order to ensure fear and caution into the hearts of many, the event was branded with the following stigma: 'The day that the fan girls gave humanity a grim reminder…'

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><p>AN: Alrightttt so… If the summary didn't give it away… I'm a straight guy who is very VERY curious about the popularity of Levi XD. Idk, I can usually see what girls can see in guys, but with him, I just don't know so yeah… This just popped up in my head when a friend of mine said that she wants a personXLevi fanfic and this just kept going XD. It was originally just going to be Levi and one girl, but I just found this idea to be that much more fun to write, when considering that while I don't dislike the series, I don't overly like it either so yeah XD.

**EITHER WAY THIS WAS FOR YOU MIYA-CHAN AND I HOPE THAT YOU LIKED YOUR PRESENT 3 :D**

If this story actually receives a decent amount of response, (which it wont cuz its purposefully shit XD), then I may continue and add some more to it… I have a couple possible ideas but idk :').

UNTIL THEN… Take care you guys – whoever's reading this XD.

Please review and fav this story :') and yeah… :3

See ya later! :D

- Dippytrippy122


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